Friday, April 26, 2013

My Darling

Gary died this morning as he lived his life. It was very gentle. Hana had just said goodnight and I said I would wake them if anything changed. I was cuddled up on the couch.As soon as Hana's feet made sounds on the upstairs floorboards his breathing altered and he died. It was quiet and gentle and exactly as he wanted it. He had said to me that he just wanted me there and thats how it was.

53 comments:

  1. Kat I'm so sorry. I'm sure that there's never enough time to prepare for something like this. I'm also sure you'll continue to deal with events as you have for the last couple of years, appreciating all the good things and being strong. You are awesome! x

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  2. thank you Michelle for your kind words.Gary would be pleased.I will keep in contact via your blog, Gary always loved your posts

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  3. Thinking of you and the kids Kat. It's the afternoon here, so OK to go to the pub and have a drink and toast to Gaz!

    Arohanui, Dave and Lynne

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    1. xx he would like that. I am hoping Sue rang you and you didn't just read this. He so loved his big brothers and looked up to them.

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    2. Graham and Sue phoned earlier Kat. Take care ... pub here we come ;)

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  4. We are thinking of you and the kids Kat.

    Bill and Family.

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  5. Thinking of you and your family. Gary was a good man who left the world a better place.

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  6. Kat, i am so sorry, but at the same time so thankful you were granted some more of the precious time that you wanted. Thinking of you all. God bless, Kate, Simon & family

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  7. Sorry to hear that Kat, nothing can replace such a great man. We pray the love of God enfolds you during your difficult times and he helps you heal with the passage of time.

    Raju&Priya

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  8. Morning Kat - It's very sad to read your blog this morning. We are all thinking of you and the kids and the wonderful Gaza. Lots of love Dougal and family

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  9. Woman of courage and faith, you have loved so well. Nothing really prepares for the leaving but what a gift your times together have been. You have all been in our prayers and minds particularly last night. We're glad for the final gentleness. There are no right words to let you know how we care but we pray God holds you close. Lots of love and hugs when you need them. Nic and Rich xxx

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  10. Gary,
    Haere pai atu, hoki pai mai, Travel safely.
    Kat and family,
    Mā te Atua koe e manaaki,
    God is watching over you.
    Te mamae me te pōuri nui e ngau kino nei,
    Love and sympathy.

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  11. We love you Aunty Kat, Hana, Kenzie and Zac. Have been thinking about you since Dad phoned this morning. I have Been talking to the boys about their wonderful Great Uncle. Arohanui Katrina, Phil, Joshua Kaleb and Jackson. xxx

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  12. Kat I am so very sorry to hear this news. I am so thankful as well Gary's passing was peaceful at home with the ones he cherished. Thinking of you all the time. Kristy xxx

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  13. A great man, a good friend, a great loss
    Kat, my thoughts are with you and the kids

    Stuart R

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  14. Kat, It has been a privilege to have known such a great guy - the way you have all handled the adversity of the last 3 years has been courageous and inspiring. Sending you all our support and much love

    Brendan, Gill & family

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  15. Love you Kat, I too will have a quiet Appletons in his memory. A great man. :-(
    Paul V

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  16. Kat, our thoughts are with you and your family. Gary really was the best of the best.

    Dan & Gen

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  17. Arohanui Kat and whanau, my thoughts are with you all. He was a lovely man. Debbie Waldron (nee Taiaroa)

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  18. Thinking of you and your family Kat. Gary was a great person, will miss him.
    Ash & Dee

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  19. I am saddened to read of this as I wake this morning....I know we don't know each other in real but i have been touched to follow your journey . How wonderful that you were able to create such wonderful memories and fun over the last bit of time....you are strong and I am sure that you will lead your family on in strength.....and long for that day that you will be reunited.
    Take care and now it is time for you to let your family take care of you for a while. xxxxx

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  20. Hi Kat
    Massive love and hugs from us. Let me know if there is anything you need done.
    Paul and Lynn xxxx

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  21. So sorry to hear sad news today Kat. Will remember his gentleness & his smile. So glad my kids knew him. Peace & Aroha to you all,
    Keri Richard Ruben & Sarah

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  22. Oh Katherine with a K, I am so sorry to hear that. Big hugs and lots of love from Catherine with a C

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  23. Oh Kat, I am thinking of you all. Sending hugs and strength.

    Love Karina

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  24. Hi Kat
    Huge hugs. Your strength has been an inspiration. So lovely to read it was gentle. Gary can now rest in peace. No more struggle.
    Love from Glenda and Rick xx

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  25. dear Kathryn and family.
    Mervyn and I just want you to know we are thinking of you all constantly as you deal with the loss of precious Gary. Kathryn you have been so courageous, loving and caring of Gary in the journey he has been taking. We will no doubt see you soon, but love and strength for the next few days as you deal with all that it brings. If we can do anything at all just ask. Much love Aunty Helen and Uncle Mervyn












































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  26. Dear Lovely Kat ... my thoughts, love and prayers are with you ... Gary fly free ... you are safely home in the arms of our awesome God.

    Krys

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  27. My dear friend, I am so sorry for your loss. I am holding you near and dear to my heart. Sending love to you and yours. xoRuth W.

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  28. Dear Kat, So sorry to hear the news just now - nothing eases that moment even though it was not unexpected. May you all know God's presence surrounding you right now and in the days and weeks to come. Take comfort from knowing that Gary has just gone on ahead and you will be reunited one day. Much love and hugs, Rachael. XX

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  29. So sorry for your loss Kat. Our thoughts are with you and the kids.
    Andrew & Kirst T

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  30. So sad for you all. Thinking of you and sending hugs.
    Love from Tessa & Vic xxx

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  31. Darling Kat, Anna let me know, but I wanted to come here and see your own words too. Thinking and praying and sending you so much love all day and tonight. For you and the whanau...From Jo and Anna and David and Matt xxxxxxxxxx

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  32. Unconditional love to you all. Very sad to read this. Found out from Cat a few minutes ago.Love to you all.xxx
    Callum,Cat, and Hugh

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  33. Dear Kat, Arihana, Mackenzie and Zach, our love and thoughts are with you all. Thank you for bravely sharing your journey with such honesty, sadness, humour and above all, grace. We will continue to hold you in our prayers as this journey continues. I hope that in some small way the overwhelming love of your friends and family sustains you all in the days ahead. Gary was an absolute gentleman and will be sadly missed. Sharon, Greg, Sean, Reuben, Liam and Emilie Cook xoxoxo

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  34. Sending love and thoughts all the way down the otago peninsula to you all. Kia kaha kat, hana, maca n zac. You remain one of the most beautiful families i know. Peace and love sacchi xxxx

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  35. So sorry to hear this Kat. You have all been very brave. Thinking of you all, Miree, Reef, Bella, Alex and Nick

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  36. Your faith is your strength now Kat and I know that God has you, Hana, Kenzie and Zak in his arms. As you say farewell to Gary for the time being, others are reaching out to welcome him home. God bless you all - Rosemary and Nicholas

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  37. Thinking of you kat, Hana Mac and zac!
    All my love to you guys!
    Your always and forever in my thoughts Gary!
    Lots of love and hugs, Georgia xxx

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  38. This is very sad news Kat,my warmest thoughts are with you and the chicks, you rare and amazing bird.

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  39. Kat Im so sorry to hear of Gary... Wow he just kept on going eh amazing he was and because he had you right there with him and his beautiful kids...I know you have lots of support, am sending much love and the biggest of hugs for you all... You are an amazing woman and Im coming to see you one day XXXXX

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  40. Kat,

    You may remember me, I came to your house with Nicolas Birch late last year. I remember how amazed I was at the kindness you and Gary offered me, a great meal, kind words, and great conversation. It was most amazing to me because I was a total stranger and your family was going through so much at the time. What was most amazing to me was the wonderful conversation I had with Gary. I really feel privileged to have met him. As a stranger in a chance meeting, he shared so many great things with me. Without a doubt, a chance meeting for a couple of hours that I will never forget in my lifetime. Thank you.

    Mike

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    1. Mike I do remember you and the evening,It was a pleasure to meet you.thank you for your kind words, I also remember you talking to Gary about your brother,xx

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  41. I have read and reread your comments a few times as some things get missed. Thank you all so much for your kind and encouraging words.It really is lovely seeing all the lives gary has touched and the care and concern shown here.xx

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  42. Sarah and Matt EvansApril 28, 2013 at 7:05 PM

    Hi Kat - Sarah Evans from the Microsoft Fiji trip here. Matt told me about Gary's illness last year. We were just gutted for you both. Such beautiful, fun people the pair of you. You both left such a mark on us. What a team! I have followed your blog weekly and have been in awe that you still manage to write so beautifully (with such refreshing honesty) through such challenging times. I swear, between you both you've inspired a legion out here in cyber space. I have no doubt Gary will get the fantastic send off he deserves. We will be raising our glasses here in Auckland in salute of him. Much love and hugs to you and your family for the ooming weeks and months ahead. Sarah & Matt Evans xxoo

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  43. Hello Kat- so sorry to read about your husband I have been following your blogs along with Gary's for some time from Canada. My husband to has been on this wild journey with sarcoma since Dec 2009. It has given me a great amount of support to read your family's stories. Gary like David ( my husband) had an amazing way of dealing with this brutal cancer in such a possible manner.
    Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time. Thank you again for sharing. Mary Louise .

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  44. Hi Kat - both my family and the Enabling family have been following your journey with Gary intently and we're all terribly sad with the news. Gary was a man who always challenged us and inspired us to do great things, and this world is lucky to have had him. We will always remember to think outside the box, to challenge the status quo, to try harder and to love life and new experiences thanks to Gary. All our love - Sarah, Ryan & the team xxxxx

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  45. This has been inspiring example of adversity matched with tremendous courage and willpower. Kat, it is timely to recognise your role in this struggle to deal with such daunting challenges on a day-to-day basis for such a time period. And for both of you to share with family, friends and colleagues your experiences in this public way has been generous and illuminating.

    We can see what an enthusiastic and committed family man that Gary was, and how enriched your lives must have been with these experiences of emotional highs and lows. You have reminded all on the things that really matter in the time we have been given.

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  46. Kat, much love from afar and from the past. I am devastated to hear your news. All of my memories of Gary are fun filled, life filled ones. (Wacky wacky sports days came into my head today). I am so happy to see that you have so many people full of love around you to help you through this. Accept their support - you deserve it. Deanne, Sudesh, Madison and Piperxx

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  47. So sorry to hear about Gary. He was a great man. Our thoughts and love were with you today. Love Chris, Emma, Ellie, Olivia,Kate Meynell

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  48. Dear Kat - hand on my heart for you, Gary and your children. I only met Gary a few times; the love and good humour between you was strikingly present. What a tough journey you have been on together, and how courageously you walked alongside. Sending you love, light and strength, Claire xo

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Hi I love to receive comments and will endevour to reply either on this page or your blog.Kat